Why I have chosen to perform in the Mordor Comedy Festival

Listen, I understand your arguments against appearing in this comedy festival, but I am going to entertain the citizens of Mordor despite the actions of their leader, Sauron, and those associated with him.

So many have come to me saying I can’t perform there because of all the various abuses and war crimes. But doing stand-up for a bunch of orcs and trolls and dark wizards doesn’t mean I endorse that sort of stuff, even though there is a provision in my contract that says I need to endorse that sort of stuff.

Sure, there are the mass killings in Durthang or near the Black Gates. But Sauron is actually trying to modernize Mordor and promote amicable relationships with various other lands, so what’s a little light genocide here and there? That shouldn’t preclude me from getting on stage and telling a few racist and transphobic jokes for a half hour. [...]